Thinking on "paper"

Just so you know.... Our family is NOT perfect. We do not think we have it all together. We serve a merciful savior. We are saved by HIS grace. We are thankful.

Some of you who read this will "get it", others will not and that's ok. Listen, we were called by God to add to our family by way of adoption. We KNOW that God designed our family. We know that whether our children came to us by by birth or adoption that HE meant for them to be "here"......

I was thinking this morning in my quiet time. When we set out on this adoption journey, I thought I knew what to expect...HA! I had no idea. When we were gathering our documents for our dossier in 2006, I had "fantasies" in my mind about flying home on an airplane with a newborn in my arms....HA! I thought I knew how I would react when I saw what I saw in Guatemala, be it the first time or the eighth time....God is FOREVER changing me, molding our family into HIS image. I often think I know where he is taking us....HA! Never in a million years did I think it would take until Dec of 2008 to get Alejandra home. Never did I think adoption would completely shut down in the middle of our process. I still can't comprehend all of the divine happenings that took place to bring HIS child home to our family. He is so faithful.

Now one would think that when Alejandra came home that all would fall into place and the days would be shiny and bright ....Yes, we had MANY days like that. But I want to be very transparent with you today. That there was an adjustment period. A period where our older kids weren't so sure the adoption thing was all it was cracked up to be....ANYTIME you bring another human being into your home there is an adjustment. Even if you waited and prepared for their arrival for almost 2 years. Even if you love that person with all of your heart. Even if you know God placed them there......I had times where I felt I had no support, There were times when I would cry just out of pure exhaustion......There were times when the emotion of the prior 2 years would come flooding out uncontrollably. the Joy of having her home and the pain of what it took to get her here would collide in a way that is unexplainable....there were times where I just needed to go to the bathroom with out being bothered. Those are the days where I knew God was there. Because these times were short lived. I had wisdom beyond my experiences and love beyond anything I could comprehend. So with all of that said....

Looking forward to when D and H get to come home.....I'm getting "prayed up" God has a plan and I know there will be adjustments to make on every ones part....As we all know that there are no perfect people. We all have "issues" and my beautiful children (all of them) have issues and real pain. Certain events or experiences shape who we are. God uses these things in our life for his glory. We are adopting two children that have faced more pain in there little lives than few can imagine. God has clearly had his hand on these two from even before they were born. I am excited to see what God's plan for their lives will be. Lord willing! I cannot wait to move through this process again bringing these two precious human beings into our family. The Lord is so good, he is so faithful. He gives us strength to endure, he desires to give us beyond what we can ask or think....

God's plan has worked PERFECTLY for our family. Our 3 at home are well adjusted and HAPPY. They love and respect each other, they "fight" like "normal" brother and sisters. I am so thankful for the "rough" times, the adjustments we have made and Gods plan that has become reality in our home. And by the way....they love the idea of this adoption "thing".

The visions and dreams that God has placed in my heart are exciting to me. I look forward to the day I can post that we have a court date. It is coming. He is faithful.

ISAIAH 40:13 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.